On May 25th, 2007, my career as a massage professional changed more than I ever could have imagined. When my husband handed me the most beautiful baby girl I had ever seen; my priorities and focus immediately shifted to a far greater, demanding, rewarding, and amazing job.
As for working during my pregnancy, I felt great for the most part. Those first few weeks of nausea :/ I eyed the sink in my room a lot and questioned whether I was going to need to make it there. However, after that was over I was able to work nearly a week past my due date. I was comfortable and had the energy and desire to continuing working. I had every intention on returning to work after my maternity leave, at least part-time. Foolishly, I figured I would find a day care provider for twenty hours a week and return to work with the same mindset and passion I had prior to my daughter’s birth.
Before my leave, a friend asked me to schedule a massage for her and her husband before their vacation. We knew it would be 4 weeks after the delivery, but figured I would be able to give two massages by then. When I went in for those two massages, something was definitely missing. It was my focus and presence; something I rarely had to work on in the past. I obviously was not ready, but I figured this was normal for all new moms. I was out of practice and in a couple months I would recapture my focus and get the rust out of my hands. After two more months past, I knew I still was not ready to return. My daughter made the decision even easier as she had decided that she was not going to take a bottle at all. Returning to work at that time would not have been fair to my clients, me, and especially my daughter. So, I stayed where I wanted to be and where I was needed.
I rarely scheduled massages for the next year. The couple massages I scheduled a week, at times, even seemed like too much. I instead took this time to read, learn, and research the field of massage. I grew in other ways as a massage professional. I launched my home business, Advanced Massage Techniques, which offers online massage continuing education courses. Finally, after a year, I felt I was ready to work a little more. My wonderful mom stepped in to look after my daughter in my absence. When I go to work, I know my daughter is taken care, her needs are being met, and there is a very good chance she is being spoiled. This makes my ability to focus on my clients much easier. I still find it difficult to leave my daughter for those 10 hours a week, but I value the time I am at work. I consider myself a stay-at-home mom with a mini career.
Before my daughter was born, I was able to be flexible, readily available, and easily present for my clients’ massage sessions. Once I returned to work, I wanted to be home more often with my daughter and my husband. I had to set better time boundaries, something I always struggled with previously. Most clients were also parents and we supportive of my new work schedule. For the clients I could not accommodate, there was little I could do but refer them to other qualified practitioners. I also have another person to alter my schedule. Luckily, Ava has been extremely healthy, and very happy. I still have to work harder to be present at each massage, but I have found ways to manage this problem. I believe I am a different, and hopefully better, practitioner today then before my daughter was born.
I know massage has made my daughter a calm, healthy, and happy child. Also,
I feel I am a calmer and more competent parent because of our massage sessions. I am happy my children will grow up in a home with filled with unconditional love and positive, healthy touch; which will benefit them throughout their lives. As I mentioned, I am adopting a little girl from China who is going to need a few surgeries to repair her cleft lip. I know my clients have already expressed their concern about my leave, but also they have expressed their support for my family. I have GREAT clients! This past year of paperwork has made me see that I need to work on my concentration again. As our travel nears, and my excitement and nervousness grow, I know I will have to work really hard to stay present. I know it is temporary and I CAN do it.
How has parenting affected your work? How do you balance your job as a parent and practitioner? How do you remain focused on each job?
Ivy Hultquist, Mom, LMT
Advanced Massage Techniques –Massage Continuing Education, Massage CEUS, Home Study and Online Massage Courses
Hi Ivy, I first want to thank you so much for posting this insightful post! I hope you and your family are doing well. I am now 32 weeks with my 3rd pregnancy. This post is so helpful and inspiring that you don’t have to be a full time MT and have a family at the same time. I want to leave my clients in good hands and then really take my time returning to work- it will be a big shift for me personally and financially for my family. It’s so great that you took the opportunity to create your home business and really develop yourself as an MT in a different way. There is so little literature on the nature of being a present parent and an MT out there. Thank you for sharing your experience and your passion!
Thanks for stopping by! I receive a lot of messages from MT’s that feel the same way. Like most of the messages I receive, I love the flexibility of being and MT for my family. There are not many jobs where you can pay for your groceries for the week in a couple hours and then get to spend that extra time with your family. I really enjoy my time with my clients in those few hours too.
It is a balancing act.
Best wishes on #3 and the changes ahead! I hope to be there soon too! I just wish my clients listened to me when I tell them to get a massage when I am gone 😉
Yes! It’s been a challenge to encourage my current clients many of whom have been with me for many months or even years to accept the referrals I suggest. But hopefully, when they really need it they will reach out to my good friend who will be providing massage during my leave. It’s hard to know what will be the right amount of time when returning to work. But I am sure that I will be smart enough this time to recognize my own and my family’s limitations when I return to work. Thanks again and keep on blogging!